You Were My Sight For Sore Eyes

Paranoia drives me
i can't see you anymore.
This is no dream
We all just need a silent cry
We all just need a night on our own
to be wreckless.
why can't i see you?
i'm not blind anymore
but you're gone now
Show me the way
i'll show you mine.
how can life be so cruel
it's bittersweet
honey i can see now

My Precious Glass

You make yourself
clear as glass,
What you think of me.
The way i "act"
The way i "speak"
The way i "seem"
The way i don't move,
The way i don't talk,
I want to see through you,
but you appear everywhere,
Especially nowhere.
I want to break the glass,
and not care.
I want to make my walls,
and put you on its other side.
You don't deserve to know me,
Let me know when you do.

Dont Pity Me, I Just Needed Help

Gazes, and stares
of feared pain
of hopeful forgiveness

Your words nearly stab me
so just stab me.
I don't want your pity

You hugs suffocate me
with forced happiness.
Please don't make me fake

Pity the fool who is not me.
I cry not for attention
I died for your help.

My heart is weak
growing weaker.
My soul ages
as my body slows its pace

I'm gone,
And it was too late.

Shut Up And Trust Me

I can.
You can.
She could.
We could.

So why didn't
I
you
she
we?

Know that
I will,
and
We will,
so just
Shut up and trust me.

'you should'
'you should'
that's all she told you isn't it?
but you are
you
are imperfection

Know that
you are
you
are perfect
for being imperfect.

Know that
you are
you
and be damned proud of it.

Make it
so everyone sees your flaw
Make it
so they love you for it
Make it
so you know you're only human.
Make it
so you can

Shut up and trust me.

Disrespected

"it's good"
in other words
why don't you just keep it like that
in other words
why don't you just keep it ordinary
in other words
why don't you just keep it the way it is
because there is no way this can get you anywhere
is that what you mean?
because i don't hear anything along the lines of
why aren't you successful
why aren't you taking it further
Well
why aren't you on my side
why aren't you supporting
this,
me?

Parenting

Your compliments
are empty
with no support.

Your words
are suffocating
I cannot speak on my own.

Your belief in me
is nonexistant
and all i can do
is use it to drive
my hard work harder,

to show you that
you were wrong,
though you'll never admit it,
won't even apologize,
but that's all right,

because it'll hit you
like you hit me.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.7

What Do You Want From Me?

I express my passion to you and you shut it away
like it is pointless
like what i do is preposterous
like what i enjoy will get me nothing in life.
so i try to impress you by changing
but it only worsen,
and instead of shunning it,
you competely disagree with me
and want me to do something,
something you believe much more productive.
Which in my eyes is
boring as hell.

Yes i will agree it is not a bad thing,
but i will never do such a thing,
for it is not me.

But how can you just sit there
and turn everything i love to do
away?
How can you just let me lose myself and fade away
all i can do now is just exist.
no life
no death...

Lies

Everyone does it...
It is inevitable,
they fix nothing,
they are selfish.
The first one,
its reason is
for your own pleasing.
You may seem like making peace,
but War is ready to come,
so you damn well be prepared
for a shitload.

My Addiction To Escape

It is my only escape,
I am in my own little world and
i will never have to think about
your face,
what you did to me.
I can just keep going and going,
I'll never stop.
I can't,
I won't let myself
stop and think of the pain i will never be able to rid from.
But this is my only escape,
though it will slowly kill me outside,
i'm dead inside;
and so it shouldn't have to matter anymore.
So why is fear still flowing through my lifeless veins?

I Don't Belong...

Is it normal?
Am I?
Because I think I need to die...
I don't want to though,
but I do feel that,
my life is only being lived for personal greed,
a life of true happiness, that's it...
And I cannot stand it.
The selfishness,
it's not proper.
I don't feel good...
Should I disappear,
for good, that is...
My purpose doesn't seem good enough,
for my own self.
So I can't be good enough for anyone else,
right?

Dwelling Is an Unhealthy Symptom

How does someone prevent themselves
from dwelling on something they truly love?
It's not possible is it?
To love something means it is constantly on the mind.
You won't leave mine.
I see you face perfectly,
Everyday.
Everyday it shatters me again
and again.
So much i can barely feel it but it's not ignoreable...
The scars multiply.
The pain festers.
My smiles grow to plasticity...
No sincerity flows at all,
and I don't know how to fix it.
I'm sick of this,
not knowing...
I should leave but my pathetic soul
it is fearful of the intense,
excruciating agony to withhold.
So what now?

Content. Just Content...

I think i've found it,
without the need or support of love.
I find my punching bag on the ground,
right under my nose.
I feel...content, i think that's it.
I wouldn't want anything better or worse.
Yes...
I loved it,
for I can finally have complete vent
and closure of my raging emotions and
deathly imaginative thoughts.
In truth I have a true smirk--
no, smile in complete content.
Finally can i believe
Love is not needed
Love is not wanted
at this point at least...
I'm giving myself as much time as needed or more,
because of you...
Thank You.

I'm losing it, I know...

I'm sick of it...
Confusion.
Causing much wanted suffocation deep
within my lungs by only me
for i can not handle this...
my pain hurts
and now worse.
i'm not blaming you,
its my fault...
shortened breaths, shorter
quicker
lessened
enough was enough...
my body is here, yes.
my soul? i don't think so...

Left To Temptation

'i'm back'
it whispered
so close
it was enticing...
to him at least.
the sharpness; it felt
pain;
pure temptation.
eyes of an empty thought,
or two...
a tug
a pull.
Lead to
a give,
no more than a take
then
a jerk and a drag.
Down to earth,
then lower.
Difficulty in catching one breath,
closing in, around the neck
smother me
Suffocation in
a strangle from two hands
of my own..
choke
empty and useless...